Resources

Options for re-establishing safety:

• Addressing medical needs, which may include seeking medical care for assessment and treatment.
  • Survivors can get medical care without filing a police report or having evidence collected.
  • Survivors can tell their physical and/or mental healthcare providers what happened, however, the choice if/what/when to share is entirely up to the survivor.
    • Medical and mental healthcare providers are confidential, meaning if survivors report what happened, the provider doesn't have to report to authorities.
      • There are exceptions to confidentiality with healthcare providers. Survivors can ask their healthcare provider to explain limits of confidentiality if they're concerned about the limits of confidentiality. 
• Focusing on safety in the living environment, such as locking/replacing locks on doors and windows, having a trusted person stay temporarily, survivor staying with a trusted person temporarily, etc.
• Exercising control over what the survivor does next.
• Others respecting survivors' decisions.

• Student Health Services offers low cost sexually transmitted infection testing and medication, as well as pregnancy testing and emergency contraception.
  • Student Health Services does not gather evidence, any physical injuries will be cleaned and dressed.
• Local Hospitals: Note that evidence collection ("rape kits") are only provided at ACT, Project Help, or CARE, not in local emergency rooms.
  • Gulf Coast Medical Center (closest to campus): 13681 Doctors Way, Fort Myers
  • Lee Memorial Hospital: 2776 Cleveland Ave., Fort Myers
  • Cape Coral Hospital: 636 Del Prado Blvd., Cape Coral
  • Physician’s Regional Hospital: 8300 Collier Blvd, Naples or 6101 Pine Ridge Rd., Naples
  • Naples Community Hospital: 11190 Healthpark Blvd., Naples or 350 7^th St. North, Naples
  • Fawcett Memorial Hospital- 21298 Olean Blvd., Port Charlotte
  • Charlotte Regional Medical Center: 2500 Harbor Blvd., Port Charlotte 
• Urgent Care Centers: These offer additional options for immediate non-emergency medical care and are often faster than hospitals; significant injuries should go to an emergency room. 
  • Minute Clinic (closest to campus): 11241 Miromar Square Blvd, Estero
  • Med Express Urgent Care: 19985 S Tamiami Trail, Fort Myers
  • Bonita Health Center: 3501 Health Center Blvd, Bonita Springs
  • Lee Health Convenient Care: 13340 Metro Parkway, Suite 100, Fort Myers
• For FREE forensic/evidence collection exams ("rape kits"), STI testing, pregnancy prevention, victim advocacy, and counseling, consider the following community providers. It is not necessary to file a police report to receive any of these services:
  • Lee/Glades/Hendry Counties: Abuse Counseling and Treatment (ACT), 24 hour hotline : 239-939- 3112 (TTY)
  • Collier County: Project HELP, 24 hour hotline: 239-262-7227 (TTY)
  • Charlotte County: Center for Abuse and Rape Emergencies (CARE), 24/7 helpline: 941-637-0404 (TTY)

• Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS): 239-590-7950 during business hours, 24/7/365 Helpline: 239-745-3277
  • Free and only available for currently enrolled FGCU students.
• Free counseling and crisis services for all community members:
  
  • Lee/Glades/Hendry Counties: Abuse Counseling and Treatment (ACT), 24 hour hotline : 239-939- 3112 (TTY)
  • Collier County: Project HELP, 24 hour hotline: 239-262-7227 (TTY)
  • Charlotte County: Center for Abuse and Rape Emergencies (CARE), 24/7 helpline: 941-637-0404 (TTY)
• Community Counseling Center: 239-745-4777
  • Open to all members of the Southwest Florida community, including FGCU students.
  • Provides low-cost mental health services in English and Spanish.
• Employee Assistance Program: 833-746-8337
  • Provides free and confidential brief therapy services to FGCU employees.
  • If visiting the website, use company code: FLORIDA to access services FGCU employees are eligible for.

Under the Federal Survivors' Bill of Rights Act of 2016, all survivors have the following rights, regardless of whether they file a formal report:

• Equal treatment under the law
• Advocacy services
• Free and transparent forensic exams ("rape kits")
• The same legal protections as other crime victims, including compensation available through the Victims of Crime Act of 1984

 

Under Florida Statute, survivors have additional rights and protections if they file a criminal report:

• To have their identity kept confidential and exempt from public records requests ("rape shield law")
• To have an advocate present during a forensic examination and/or discovery deposition (a defense attorney’s pre-trial questioning of witnesses)
• To have the offender, if charged with the crime, tested for HIV and hepatitis and to receive the results of that testing
• To attend the sentencing or disposition of the offender and give an impact statement at sentencing
• To be told of judicial proceedings and scheduling changes
• To have information about the release of the offender from incarceration, juvenile detention facility, or residential commitment facility
• To tell the prosecutor what they want to happen in the case
• To request restitution (financial compensation for costs incurred due to the crime)
• To not be asked or required to take a polygraph examination ("lie detector test") as a condition of going ahead with the investigation
• To take up to three days of leave from work to deal with issues that arise

Survivors choose whether to report what happened to any authorities. There is no "right" or "wrong" decisions when it comes to reporting.

 

• IF a survivor chooses to report, speaking with a confidential support person before can be very helpful as they can listen, help survivors explore their options in a nonjudgmental environment, and provide support in a private setting.
  • At FGCU, confidential support options include the Victim Advocate, Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) staff, and Student Health Services staff (see "Where to Go for Help" on ARISE main page for details).
    • Confidential resources are important because they cannot report to the university or police what survivors experienced, whereas other university employees (including professors, RAs, etc.) are required to inform the Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance of any instances of sexual violence survivors tell them about.
  • Off-campus confidential support options are available through ACT, Project Help, and CARE (see "Where to Go for Help" on main ARISE page for details).

 

• IF a survivor chooses to report to police, some common things to expect include:
  • The survivor will be asked to share and write down what happened in as much detail as possible.
  • Police will ask questions to gather additional details, such as times, locations, names of witnesses, activities engaged in, etc.
  • An voluntary forensic exam ("rape kit") can be completed by a specially-trained nurse; this includes taking photos, collecting clothing, and swabbing skin and/or genital areas. 
    • If there may be evidence on the survivor's  body, there is a greater chance of preserving the evidence when the survivors avoids bathing, brushing their teeth, or changing clothes prior to a forensic exam.
      • Even if the survivor has already bathed, changed clothes, or brushed their teeth, they can still request a forensic exam and file a police report.
  • If available, police may ask to review communication with the perpetrator on a survivor's phone, inspect the location where the crime occurred, or gather other details of the crime.
  • Survivors are entitled to have an advocate or trusted person of their choosing with them during forensic exams and police interviews.

 

• IF a survivor chooses to report to the FGCU Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC)  (including if the incident occurred off-campus), some common things to expect include:
  • Survivor will meet individually with a Title IX investigator/Deputy Title IX Coordinator, who is a specially trained staff person who gathers information about what happened.
  • Survivors will be asked to share what happened in as much detail as possible.
  • The investigator will ask questions to gather additional details, such as times, locations, names of witnesses, activities engaged in, etc.
  • If available, survivors will be asked to share any communication they had with the perpetrator, any physical evidence (such as photos or the results of a forensic exam), and/or any witnesses. 
  • Survivors are entitled to have an advocate or trusted person of their choosing with them during meetings with the OIEC.

Creating a consistent sense of safety can take weeks, months, or longer. Everyone is different and healing takes time.

• Focusing on basic needs (food, shelter, sleep, medical and mental health care, hydration, hygiene) is a good place to start. Creating routines around essential needs can make a big difference. 
• Attending to safety in the living environment, such as nightlights, additional locks on doors/windows, safety plan, etc. can provide control and reduce feelings of being in danger.
• Practicing making decisions and asserting boundaries can help survivors reclaim their sense of autonomy.
• Learning how to manage reactions to sexual violence (e.g., flashbacks, avoidance of reminders, feeling on-edge, sleep issues, etc.) can help survivors create greater emotional stability. See the Exploring Options for Care tab below for more details on learning how to manage reactions. 

After sexual violence, many survivors struggle to trust others, including people they've known for a long time. 

• If and when survivors are ready, they can choose to talk with someone they trust (e.g., family, friend, therapist, doctor, etc.). Survivors choose what and when to share. Survivors are not obligated to share details with anyone. 
  • Choosing to share with others can provide the opportunity to receive support and (re)establish connections with others. Feeling isolated and being alone in this experience can be particularly hard; having others to speak with can be helpful to survivors. 
    • Some survivors feel more comfortable connecting with other survivors through social media, online support groups, and/or group therapy. CAPS, ACT, Project Help, CARE, and other providers offer groups for survivors. Check the Options for Mental Health Care tab above for details on these agencies' services.
  • Survivors do not have to heal alone. Help is available. There are options (including free ones) for medical care, mental health care, and crisis support. Check the Options for Mental Health Care tab above for details.
  • If survivors are open to it, loved ones can help survivors create routines, maintain stability, and provide opportunities for learning to trust others again.
• Key factors for healthy and supportive relationships include non-judgment, respect, safety, and trust. 

• Self-blame, shame, worthlessness, and guilt are common following sexual violence. Understanding the roles of these reactions can help survivors learn why they feel like they do and start to shift responsibility to those who perpetrated, enabled, and/or ignored sexual violence.
  • These reactions can allow survivors to feel some sense of control after sexual violence (i.e., "If it's my fault, then I can keep it from happening again"). It can be very challenging for survivors to start to consider that they may not be at fault for what happened. Healing takes time. 
  • Survivors may internalize negative messages from others, such as when others don't believe the survivor, don't respond in a helpful way, or they permit the violence to continue.
  • These reactions are more likely to develop among survivors who experience multiple incidents of sexual violence, as survivors often feel they’re "causing" or "deserving" of what happened to them.
• Unlearning shame, self-blame, guilt, and/or worthlessness often takes time. 
• When survivors can shift responsibility for sexual violence to those who perpetrated, enabled, or ignored sexual violence, they often experience a reduction in mental health difficulties.

There are many options for care that survivors can choose from. There is no one "right" answer for how to heal. Many survivors practice multiple options for healing, including:

• Therapy (individual, group, couple's/relationship, family)
  • Therapy does not have to include discussing the details of sexual violence if the survivor does not want to. Therapy can focus on learning skills to manage trauma reactions (e.g., flashbacks, avoidance of reminders, feeling on-edge, sleep issues, etc.), improve relationships, manage stress, etc. In therapy, the survivor decides if, when, and how to discuss their experiences with sexual violence. 
  • There are many different types of therapy that can be helpful for processing prior traumas. Survivors can discuss with a mental health professional what type(s) of therapy may be available. 
• Medication
• Yoga (Hatha, Vinyasa, and flow yoga practices are shown to be particularly helpful for survivors)
• Meditation or other mindfulness practices
• Traditional healing rituals or ceremonies
• Spiritual counseling or practices
• Survivor-led support groups
• Storytelling, theater, dance, painting, and other creative pursuits
• Activism related to stopping sexual violence and/or supporting survivors

Processing and integrating sexual violence are only done if/when the survivor is willing and once the survivor has already established some safety, stability, and supportive relationships.

• Research shows that intentionally remembering and processing experiences of sexual violence are important to integrating the event into the survivor’s other life experiences, so the trauma becomes part of the survivor's life, instead of the defining or overwhelming part of the survivor's life.
• Processing and integration are conceptualized as recreating and transforming the trauma narrative. This enables survivors to understand the trauma more fully, to reclaim their life story, recreate a sense of control and order, and to restore a sense of themselves-apart from sexual violence. 

Sexual violence does not happen in a vacuum.

• Sexual violence is a symptom of rape culture. 

  • Rape culture is any environment in which sexual violence is prevalent, tolerated, normalized, un- or under-punished, and/or excused.

  • Rape culture causes or contributes to:

    • Blaming survivors for being harmed by sexual violence.
    • Putting all responsibility on potential survivors to stop instances of sexual violence against themselves.
    • Defending and excusing perpetrators, even when there is overwhelming evidence against them.
    • Assuming rates of false reports of sexual violence are very high and that rates of sexual violence are very low.
    • Sex crimes being the least prosecuted violent crimes in America.
    • Not believing survivors when they report.
    • Under-punishing perpetrators; only 1-3% of all perpetrators will ever serve a day in jail.
    • Intensified mental health issues. 
    • Underfunded resources for survivors.

 

Because instances of sexual violence are not "isolated incidents," it is essential that we put sexual violence into greater context. By doing so, we can start to understand that:

• We've spent centuries training people (almost exclusively women and girls) from young ages to protect themselves, though sexual violence is still pervasive.
  • This shows that focusing solely on potential victims and how they can protect themselves is not the root problem. 
• Only training potential victims to protect themselves focuses the attention on their behaviors and not the behaviors of perpetrators and their enablers.
  • Focusing on potential victims' behaviors leads to blaming survivors when sexual violence happens.
  • Perpetrators of sexual violence are often absent in discussions of sexual violence; this contributes to focusing on survivors as the main "issue" with sexual violence.
• Culture change is necessary to take sexual violence seriously, make sexual violence truly socially unacceptable, to build a culture of consent, to fully support survivors, and to prevent sexual violence.
• Helping survivors heal by putting responsibility for sexual violence onto perpetrators and their enablers (see Reducing Self-Blame, Shame, Worthlessness, and Guilt for why this is so important). 

• Minnesota Indian Women's Sexual Assault Coalition
• We As Ourselves: Shaping the Narrative about Black Survivors
• Center for the Pacific Asian Family: Sexual Assault Response Team
• National Organization of Asian and Pacific Islanders Ending Sexual Violence
• And Still I Rise: Black Women Confronting Rape
• Existe Ayuda Toolkit

• FORGE
• LGBTQ Resources
• Community United Against Violence
• National LGBTQ Institute on Interpersonal Violence
• The Network to End Partner Abuse
• The Survivor Project

• Men Healing
• Male Survivor
• 1 in 6
• Department of Defense Safe Helpline
• Make the Connection
• Living Well

• DAWN: Emerging as s Safer Deaf Community
• Sexual Abuse of People with Disabilities
• Disability Advocacy Considerations
• Supporting Survivors of Sexual Assault with Disabilities
• Victim-Centered Approaches: Victims Who Have Disabilities
• Serving Survivors with Disabilities

• A Long Walk Home 
• Service Women's Action Network (SWAN)
• Coalition to Stop Violence Against Native Women
• National Organization of Sisters of Color Ending Sexual Assault
• The Road to Meaningful Living
• Make the Connection
• Ujima: National Center on Violence Against Women in the Black Community

• After Silence en Espanol
• Que Debemos hacer Despues De Sufrir un Abuso Sexual?
• La Red: Movillizando para Acabar con el Abuso de Pareja
• La Linea de Ayuda Nacional Online de Asalto Sexual
• Arte Sana: Victim Advocacy Sin Fronteras (en Espanol)
• National Center for Victims of Crime: 855-484-2846 (multi-language services available)

• Communicate that you believe the survivor directly, even if you think they must know.

• Options to communicate you believe them include:

  • I believe you.
  • This wasn’t your fault.
  • You didn’t deserve this.
  • I care about you. 

• Listen actively. 
• Try to understand their perspective, rather than just waiting to respond. 
• Avoid rushing to give advice.
• Do NOT make them talk about it if they they don't want to.
• Avoid platitudes (e.g., 'Everything happens for a reason'); these often make the survivor feel dismissed or unheard.
• Options to show you're listening include:
  
  • I'm here to listen as long as you need me.
  • Would you like to talk about it? And it's okay if you don't want to. 
  • What do you need? How can I help? What can I get you?
  • Would it be helpful to talk through your options?

• Survivors' most basic needs after sexual violence are reestablishing safety and control.
  • Promote these by following their lead, respecting their decisions, and avoiding comparing their experiences to others' experiences.
• Avoid telling survivors what you would do in this situation as this could make them feel pressured to do what you want or make them feel like they did something wrong. 
• Maintain a non-judgmental attitude.
  • Even if you don't understand or agree with what the survivor did before, during, or after sexual violence, it's important to remember that you don't have to understand or agree with them to support them.
  • Judgment from others often intensifies survivors' reactions, so it's important to focus on support and work to stay non-judgmental.
• Options for showing respect include:
  • I understand you don't want to talk about it right now, but if you want to in the future, I'm always here for you.
  • I will support you regardless of what you choose to do next.
  • You know what's best for you.
  • I'm here to help any way I can. 

• Always follow what the survivor wants to do.
• If they agree, contact professionals for help, such as a victim advocate, crisis hotline, therapist, or other medical professional.
• Encourage the survivor to get medical care, even if they don't want evidence collected or to file a report.
  • Support them even if they don't want to get medical care.
• Follow-up, don't assume they will let you know if they need help later.
• Options to offer to take action include:
  • I can find out options for medical care or reporting, is that okay with you?
  • I'm sure it's scary to consider talking to a doctor/counselor/advocate/police, but they may have important information to share. How would you feel about contacting someone?
  • Even if you don't want evidence collected or to file a police report, you can still see a doctor to get checked out. Would you like me to go with you?
  • Since you said you want to be alone right now, I'll go. Is it okay if I call/text you tomorrow to check in?

•  Let them know about their campus, local, and national resources.
  • Refer to sections above for campus and local options.
  • National resources to share with survivors:

    • National Sexual Assault 24/7 Hotline: 800-656-4673 and online chat

    • National Domestic Violence 24/7 Support Line: 800-799-7233 and online chat

    • Safe Horizon Crime Victims Hotline: 866-689-4357

    • Family Violence Helpline: 800-996-6228

    • Child Help National Child Abuse Hotline: 800-422-4453

    • National Center for Victims of Crime: 855-484-2846 (multi-language services available)

• All FGCU staff and faculty (including RAs) are Responsible Employees, meaning they must report all instances of discrimination (including sexual violence) they learn of to OIEC.

  • Only exceptions are on-campus confidential resources: Victim Advocate, CAPS staff, Student Health Services staff, and Community Counseling Center staff.

    • Responsible Employees should offer survivors options for discussing what happened confidentially, in addition to their requirement to notify OIEC (see details below).

• Responsible Employees MUST notify the OIEC by email, Ethicspoint Hotline, or phone (239-745-4366).
• Inform the survivor they can report the incident(s) themselves, you can report with them together, or allow the survivor to see/listen as you report so they’re as involved and empowered as possible. Let the survivor know these options and allow them to choose how to proceed. If the survivor says they don't want a report filed at all, Responsible Employees are still required to file a report using one of the above methods. 
  • Option for communicating you are required to report to OIEC:
    • I know you may not want me to report this to OIEC, but, I’m required to. So we can report together or you can listen to or read my report if you choose. Know that just because this gets reported, doesn’t mean you have to participate in an investigation or that an investigation will take place. 
• Inform the survivor that OIEC will reach out shortly to provide reporting and support options.
  • Remind survivor that just because an incident was reported does NOT mean it has to be investigated and they don’t have to participate if they don’t want it to.
    • OIEC may proceed without a survivor's involvement in rare circumstances, depending on the details (e.g., in the case of a serial perpetrator or immediate/significant risk to campus safety).

• Acknowledge that talking about what happened is a big step for survivors. 
• Recognize that if a survivor tells you what happened, that means they trust you. Make sure you maintain their trust.
• Options for thanking them include:
  • Thank you for telling me. 
  • I'm sure this isn't easy to talk about, but I'm glad you told me.
  • I appreciate you trusting me with this information.
  • I won't discuss this with anyone else unless you say it's okay.
    • See previous section on having to report to the OIEC if you're an FGCU Responsible Employee, as not everyone may be able to keep the promise not to tell anyone else about what happened. 

• It's common and okay to have your own strong reactions when a survivor tells you they've been hurt.
• Do your best to regulate your emotions so that the focus remains on the survivor and their needs.
• Make sure to take care of your needs and seek your own support after, while also maintaining the survivor's privacy (i.e., you can get your own support from someone you trust, but don't disclose the name or details that would break the survivor's privacy).
• If you're also a survivor, try not to compare your experiences with theirs.
  • The immediate period after sexual violence may not be the best time to share details of your own experiences.
  • Sharing you're also a survivor is up to you.
• Options for recognizing your reactions:
  • I'm so angry/sad/frustrated for you that this happened.
  • I can only imagine what you're going through.
  • I see how hard this is for you.
  • You don't have to take care of me. I will get my own support. I want to be here to support you.

• Respect the language the survivor uses to refer to what happened and use that language when you talk with them.
  • Many survivors do not use technical terms to refer to what happened (e.g., rape, sexual assault, stalking). It's common for survivors to say things like 'the incident,'the person who hurt me,' 'that night,' etc.
• Understand that survivors from different backgrounds may express or experience reactions to sexual violence in different ways. Remember there's no 'right' or 'wrong' way for them to respond.
  • Remember: how survivors respond in movies or TV is often very different than how survivors respond in real life.
  • Many responses to sexual violence are subtle; these reactions are no less valid than more overt reactions.
• Validate the survivor’s experiences and reactions.
• Remind the survivor they are not at fault, even if you don't understand or agree with some of the decisions they made.
  • Remember: the only people responsible for sexual violence are the perpetrators who inflict harm.
• Help the survivor identify other safe people in their support system as healing can take a village. However, do not force them to disclose what happened to others if they don't want to. 
• Allow the survivor to make their own decisions.
• You don't have to be a trained therapist, doctor, or advocate to make a difference when someone has survived sexual violence.
• Sharing with the survivor that you care about them, that you believe them, and that you're willing to help them can make a huge difference. 
• If you don't know what to say or do, ask the survivor what they could use in that moment, and then provide that. 
  • If they say they don't know, you can refer back to some of the suggestions noted above. 
• If you say or do something that upsets the survivor, apologize and take steps not to repeat what you did.

• AVOID:
  • Asking questions about what the survivor was doing, wearing, thinking, going, etc. before/during/after sexual violence. You don't need details to be supportive.
    • These questions almost always send the message to the survivor that they did something wrong and/or caused the violence to occur.
      • Instead try: This isn't your fault. You didn't deserve this.
  • Saying 'how much worse it could have been' or 'at least you're alive.'
    • These statements minimize what the survivor went through and suggest what they experienced wasn't 'bad enough.'
      • Instead try: That's really terrible. I can see how hard this is.
  • Telling survivors that 'it's in the past' or 'everything will be okay.'
    • These statements ignore what they survived may be very present for the survivor (even if the incident happened months or years ago). You also can't promise or know that everything will be okay.
      • Instead try: That must be very scary. You are safe here. 
  • Expressing you want to harm the perpetrator.
    • This centers your needs and emotions. Many survivors don't want to think about the perpetrator, let alone worry you will get in trouble for retaliating. 
      • Instead try: I'm so sorry this happened. I'm so angry this happened to you.